On episode two of Five Star Hotel, Holly Hagan organised arguably the tackiest hen doo the world has ever seen.
Then again, what more would you expect from the Geordie Shore star?
This, boys and girls, is pure trash.
Id prefer Spencer’s party. Holly and Ashley are everything I believe is wrong with the “get drunk “ and become famous generation #FiveStarHotel
— Rob Gilbert-Warsop (@robpw2) March 15, 2018
With regular hotel manager and Made in Chelsea star Spencer Matthews off duty, having cracked three of his ribs in a motorbike incident, it was up to TOWIE’s Lydia Bright and Newcastle’s finest Holly Hagan to run the show.
While Spence had spent the previous three episodes implementing a certain standard of service on the Greek island, his ‘five stars’ set up came crashing down with Holy at the helm.
Bring on the carnage!
As with all hen doos, step one was to invest in some tacky t-shirts.
Holly and Lydia had only met their guests for a few hours but Holly showed no hesitation in drawing up some tongue-in-cheek nicknames for the trio of girls.
Actually, tongue everywhere but inside the cheek…
Hannah became Horny Hannah, Dolce was knighted Dirty Dolce, and we dread to think what Holly had on the back of her t-shirt.
Having debated whether the shirts were a little too inappropriate, Holly won over a sceptical Lydia with a rousing speech.
Holly said: “It’s freedom of speech. We’re not terrorists!”
Of course, no hen party is complete without some ornaments in the shape of…
Holly and Lydia went all out with their minimalistic budget, investing in only the biggest and best products they could get their hands on.
Lydia said: “We’ve got punch with penises, I mean what girl wouldn’t like that.”
Getting “absolutely mortal” is definitely Holly’s speciality, so when it came to leading the hen doo party games, Holly was in her element.
There’s no doubt that Spencer would have been clenching his fists in anger as a bubble machine, blow-up penises and a ton of glitter came out to play.
Nevertheless, the guests seemed to enjoy it.
The icing on the cake was a choreographed striptease from the boys of Five Star Hotel.
The bride-to-be sat and soaked up the view, as her three hunks bared down to their boxers.
Former MTV Ex On The Beach star Ashley Cain may have took a bit too far though.
You know, that extra inch too much…
Spencer returned the next day, visibly angered by the lack of class showed by the Five Star Hotel crew during their party antics – it defintiely wasn’t the type of party you would have seen in SW3.
Five Star Hotel airs every weeknight on E4, at 10 pm.