Guide to the Survival of The Fittest MEN - by their most cringeworthy quotes!

In the latest episode of new ITV2 series Survival of The Fittest and the men won their second consecutive challenge.

Swimming challenge ‘Bouy Code’ was a walkover victory for the males although the nature of their victory didn’t go down well with the girls.

Labelling their rivals “arrogant” it was a bitter reaction from the women. Headed by Georgia, who announced “I don’t fancy any of them anymore”, The Lodge may see few sleep over clubs following the lads’ inability to do anything but gloat as loudly as they can.

It’s a merry-go-round of drama in the South African savanna, full of physical activities and sexual tension.

Just three days into the show and we have already seen one eviction in Tia Latham, one withdrawal through injury in Dani Was Dyer, and two newbies join the female pack.

When it comes to the men however, and each of the geezers have almost identical bodies, boasting carved six-pack abs and broad shoulders. They may provide some serious eye candy, but it can be difficult to differentiate them.

Fortunately, we have this handy guide to the Survival of The Fittest Men – with thanks to their painfully cringeworthy quotes.

David Lundy

Now known as Mr. Camo for his all-camouflage outfit during the opening days of the show, David is the alpha male of the pack. He’s the most muscle bound, has the deepest voice, has already snogged a ‘bird’ in Georgia, and even has the confidence to wear an all camo outfit.

“I like to think my loyalties will lie with the boys, although I could be swayed by a decent set of boobs.”

Here he is . . .  if you can spot him that is.

Screen Shot: SOTF – It’s Morphin Time

Callum Pardoe

“Look how cute that baby rhino is . . .actually I don’t think that is a rhino.”

As soon as you see Callum, you think private school rugby player. He has that annoyingly squared jaw and blank canvas face as if he’s going to quip something posh every second. When he opens his mouth however, and you realise that the 21-year-old Welshman isn’t posh at all. He may not be the sharpest tool in the shed either.

Warren Phillips

Tattooed Warren is pretty self-obsessed, the only guy – or girl for that matter – to take a nail file with him to the diary room. He comes across as a ‘try hard lad’ which is something even more tragic than a naturally cocky character. I mean, listen to his quotes below, it’s enough to make your skin crawl.

“Bro’s before hoes . . . until she’s sexy, and then that sort of has to go out the window.”

ITV2: Survival of The Fittest – Warren.

“If there is a competition between me and girl, I’m going to come out on top . . . of her.”

Tristan Jones

You can instantly spot Tristan from the rest of the crowd because he ALWAYS has a smirky and smug smile wiped across his face. He’s the type of guy who only talks to girls with a pout and sure as hell believes that everyone in The Lodge fancies him because he’s some sort of model.

“Everything about me is peng innit. I’d give myself a 9.5 out of 10.”

“Why have one girl when you can have about 10.”

Jason Middleton 

Take one glance at Jason and you instantly feel like he should be on Made in Chelsea. Oh yeah, he used to date Georgia ‘Toff’’ Toffolo, that’s probably why. The mot gentleman-like of the gang, James is quite the smooth operator, although this often transforms him into a smarmy James Bond character.

Considering he’s not in the surroundings where there are vodka martini’s dotting about and is instead in a shared room with a bunch of guys, his tally with the girls is more likely to end up at 0 than it is 007.

Ryan Clearly

Perhaps the most likeable of all the men, Ryan is a 27-year-old jeweller with few d-bag quotes to his name so far.

Bro-ing down on the first night and Ryan admitted to his fellow male team-mates that he was bisexual, a move  applauded on Twitter as Ryan proved brave and honest from the go.

Do we have a winner lined-up already?

https://twitter.com/RyanClearyldn/status/963055897621794816

Tags:bisexualblokesboyscCallumCallum PardoecastcontestantscringeDavidDavid LundyfitfitnessfunnyGeorgia ToffologuideguysJasonJason Middletonladsmade in ChelseamalemenmodelquotesRyanRyan ClearySOTFstupidsurvival ofSurvival of the fittestToffTristanTristan JonesWarrenWarren Phillips

• 
  
• 
  
• 
  
• 
  
• 
  

Liam Curtis

Liam’s journalism experience covers everything from sport to health and fitness with companies such as Men’s Health and HITC. However, writing about the ridiculous antics of the Made in Chelsea crew is by far his most enjoyable job yet.