Joey Essex has been in hilarious form during new E4 series Five Star Hotel.

The Only Way Is Essex star has proved a nightmare in the kitchen, a disaster on reception and, now, seemingly useless on pet patrol.

Joey rarely featured on episode seven of the series as he momentarily popped out to carry out a one-man search party for a cat named Starvos.

Will Joe ever return?

The scene opened with J-man carrying a tiny plate of processed meat and giving his best cat impressions a shot.

We’re not sure if cats are keen on Bernard Matthews dinosaur-ham, but we love this guy for trying!

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Having constantly clashed with Made in Chelsea star Spencer Matthews, it appeared that Joey had struck up his closest bond on the Greek island with a cat.

A cat named Starvos.

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Joey crept around the hotel as if he was ambushing a deer, hollering “Starvos Starvos”, whistling, and putting on a slight Greek accent as he said the word “kitty”.

Remarkably, starving Starvos didn’t actually respond to Joey’s best foreign accent… like he usually does.

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Although the camera flashed images of the brown, black and white cat, Joey just couldn’t put his finger on his best mate’s whereabouts.

Joey said: “It’s so hard to schedule food for the cats.”

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Screen Shot: Five Star Hotel, E4

Despite Joey’s failures, Twitter loved the TOWIE stars efforts and everyone is praying that Starvos makes an appearance in the next episode.

We’d hate to see Joey attempting to put together some “missing cat” posters.

Along with Joey, other celebrities include Lydia Bright (TOWIE), Spencer Matthews (MIC), Holly Hagan (Geordie Shore) and Charlotte Dawson (Ex On The Beach).

The celebs have five weeks to make their mark as the holiday guests rate and review the celeb staff, with those scoring the lowest facing the sack.

The show airs every weeknight on E4, at 10 pm. 

Catch up on all of this season’s episodes through the Channel 4 Player.